Bold little girl.

I've been so stressy over the past couple of weeks, Trying to get everything sorted for my big adventure.
Murilos moving in here on Thursday, untill we go to brazil.
It's all rather exciting. I haven't been going out at all, i have been working and saving my dollaz so i can be rich in Brazil. i cant wait to lie on the beach and get black. I've also been running and exercising loads so i can be hot. Im so shallow, but to be totally honest i dont really care what i look like its more something to pass the time.LIES LIES LIES.
I cant belive were going in less than a month. Its crazy. I doubt anyone will even notice im gone.

The past few weeks i've been looking after my amazing goddaughter and her brother, I havent been this relaxed in so so long. Its amazing, For me anyway. I've been reluctant to go out anymore, im scared some dope will ruin my happy buzz.
I really havent written in ages, but i've been real sick too. I had to stay in bed all day on St Patricks day. Mu bought me loads of chocolate and mags and left me to relax. So much better than being in poxy town.
Im going to bed to read my amazing book.
Most pointless blog entry ever.

My mum thinks my boyfriend is hot.LOL

Oh Shit.

Okay. Today was the worst day of my life.for sure.definatly.
But all is okay. Im getting mizzonis, Which makes me very happy.
I got kicked out of my house. For the first time in like two years.
Amusement. Im a silly silly girl

Sooner than I first thought.

I guess im going sooner than I first thought. We wanna get there before Murilo's dad birthday.
We were told to just bring ourselves and Irish whisky, Such a nice family:)
Its super sad i've almost completed guitar hero. I was hoping I would never have to live this day:(
Over the past few weeks ive got so many new delish clothes, me and holly have been living like kings:)

I've just realised how stupid I am writing everything about my life on the internet.
Thanks Mu.
Haha

Sad days.

Theres no words for how im feeling today, Im sick,tired and so sad. I lost something today. Something I didnt even know I had. Something that could have changed my life competly. Im heart broken, But I have hope.

This weekend has been a huge turning point in my life. Huge.

Im moving away in june. Sooner than I though but I need to take this oppertunity before it passes me by.

Sitting in the hospital today for four hours all i could think about was everything ill be leaving behind, Im so glad to be getting away from everything and everyone. Im so excited.

New life, New place, New people but ill still have the best person in the world holding my hand and taking it all in with me.

Im sad, im going to bed. I need this day to be over.

Snap snap.

Hmm, I dont really remember the last few days, i havent been feeling great. Sooooooooo yesterday i went nuts and bought a load of new clothes. Lots of cute dresses to make me feel better. Lala la. Im tired, i didnt really sleep last night i stayed up worrying about things that dont need worrying about. I found out today that Murilo lost his job too, which is super sad. Its okay though, It mean i get to spend more time with him now. Although, im sitting in the gaff now but i have no idea where he is, hes probably upstairs doing boys stuff. Im to lazy to go look. Today i was in the shop and two scarey brazilian guys followed me around, i was quite frightened, I speak okay portuguese so i understood most of the thinks they were saying which made me even more scared. They also rammed their trolly into me at the till. I can never leave the house alone again.

Last weekend was pretty uneventful, did nothing friday night, babysat on saturday night and watched loads of delish kids movies.
Nims island is amazing.

Someone just asked me to look after their chicken thats in the oven, i keep checking on it every 5 seconds, like when the fuck am i supposed to know when chickens done, i dont eat it or ever cook it. I hope they get food poisening and die. They deserve it after making me look after their stupid chicken. Awwh im so lonely, my boyfriend is gone and victor is in bed to i cant have the laugh with him.
Were going to the social welfare office tomorrow to get the doll, well try anyways. Im still looking for a job, i really need one, freedom is calling.

I dont know why but bosco just popped into my head, i miss him and want to see him soon, we had the laugh in mayo and after i moved back here we kinda lost touch. Which is really sad because he is defo one of my favorite people. He wants me to move back down but i dont know. I would be leaving so so much behind, and things are pretty good here at the moment, ill catch up with him during the week i guess.

I can not wait to sleep.
MURILO COME HOMEEEEEE

Wish you were here.

Im sitting here listening to the cover of wish you were here, by fred durst and the guy from the goo goo dolls.
Its really really lovely. I have had it on repeat for ages now, the original is my favorite song. Im not feeling all to awesome, I dont know. It feels like something has changed with us. I don't know im scared more than anything.

Peoples attitudes have sucked the past few days, One of the guys here had a go at me for absolutly no reason, he apologised, but its not enough you know? I had an awful day yesterday i almost lost two of the most important things in the world. I was convinced i was gonna have to go back to hospital. My mum and murilo are the best people ever. They made it better. The last week has been the worst in a while. I dont feel myself. Im so so scared of losing things, i dont think people realise how much i need them. Last night if i hadn't had Mu in bed with me telling me everything is gonna be okay i dont know what i would have done, Im so lucky. I just wish i could tell people how much they mean to me, but i cant find the words. I dont think they even exist. Im sitting here so confused. Noone has done anything i just dont know what to do with myself. Im scared of my thoughts and the way my mind is carrying on. Im tired. Theres so much i want to say, but im just not bothered right now. Actions speak louder than words, Definatly.
Lets just seem what happends.

Love you.

Weekend.

Was delish and lovely.
Saturday was chill, Sunday was rad, we went to the aquarium. My favorite place in the world. We were going to go to the zoo but it was closed. Secretly I was super excited to go to Bray. Fuck the zoo.
We got super super baked on the way to Bray in the car.
Anyways we got there and all that, sadly i ruined everyones pictures because i was toooooooo high. Me and Dearbhla got into that kiddies ball pit at the end and had the time of our lives. After we left we went for a walk on the beach and went to the shittest posh chipper ever and i had a fight with the manager because he forgot half our food. NEVER AGAIN.Then we drove home and got drunk and had great chats.
I got home about two hours ago and i was in my room smoking the pipe and my little bro came in and started smoking with me, then my dad, then my mum.
Haha:)